A column by Master Ferdok about his way to live the sm with brain and heart.
I am 47 years old and I am from north-western germany. I am located in a very small city called Leer(Ostfriesland). It’s close to the dutch border. Our next bigger cities are Bremen which is at the same time my nearest airport and Emden. I am married since almost 5 years and I live openly gay. I own a house at the country side here in north-western germany without direct neighbours. My next neighbour is about 100 meters away from my property.
I am into SM for more than 25 years now. I always was a master, active and dominant and sadistic by nature. Let’s start with a very stupid thing I hear over and over again: “You can only be a good master if you have started as a slave”. Sorry but that’s bullshit. All you need to be a good master is a working brain to be able to watch your slaves how they handle things. So don’t let noone tell you that bullshit sentence. It’s simply rubbish.
Every once in a while people ask me what I like and what turns me on. Usually I am tired to answer those questions cause you just need to look at my blog and you can answer it yourself but today I feel like in a mood to write a bit about it. My favourite tool is the bullwhip. I like to tie slaves up in a spreadeagled position and to whip them. It turns me on to see the whip impacting on a slaves body. It turns me on to see the body reacting to the inflicted pain. I like to see how the muscles react and I am curious how much a new slave can take.
I like it rough and extreme. But whatever I do I always do it safe, sane and responsible.
If you want to know more about me and my other favourits so follow my column.
Dear fetish lovers,
I know that a lot of followers are new to the sm scene and that they can’t wait to make their first experiences. And I also know that when hormones are flying wildly in our imaginations we have the wildest, roughest and best sessions ever. Imagination and fantasy are important when it’s about sm but it’s better to stay with your feet on the ground and face the real thing.
Before you meet someone you have never met before pls use your brain and make sure you have the best chances to stay safe during your first meeting with a top or master. What can you do to be safe during your first meeting?
It already starts BEFORE you even meet someone.
Before you meet with a stranger make sure you have all the personal datas of that person like real name, adress, phonenumbers and maybe even a picture of that person. As soon as you have all that share these things with a person you trust. Give these details to a friend or to a family member and tell them that you will do regulary calls to tell them that you are okay and feel well in the presence with the stranger. A sane master has nothing to hide and will give you all these informations BEFORE the meeting takes place. I would not recommend to meet someone if you don’t have any informations about that person at all.
Another important thing is trust and honesty. That’s what sm is based on. If you don’t have a good feeling about a meeting don’t go there.
But if you feel good than PLS be honest and open. Don’t tell any lies. Not about your age, not about your health situation, nor hide your fears. A master needs to know if there are any issues he has to take care of. Example: If you are diabetic and need insulin on a regular base tell it to the master. If you have problems with your blood preasure for example PLS tell it to the master. A responsible master will want to have these informations before the meeting. Imagine how wrong it could go if you need to take care of these health things but you can’t because you are chained somewhere or the master just put you in a super bondage situation. Doesn’t sound really good, right?
That’s why it’s so important to be open and honest to each other BEFORE it comes to any meeting.
Lies and SM never go together!!!
Also let your master know how experienced you really are and also what you would like to experience. If he has these informations than he will know how to start that session and how quick he can go on.
The next thing you should consider is practising safe SM. If you like to collect experiences with needles for example make sure the top works clean. He should use gloves and work with disinfecting fluids for example.
If you agree to do things that have to do with blood in a dirty environment don’t complain if you get health problems after.
And last but not least: If you meet someone for the first time please do not agree to bareback. You only have this one life and there is no reason to ruin it due to unsafe sex. As long as it is the first meeting don’t agree to any unsafe action. If you meet on a regular base make sure both of you are checked being healthy. Both the master and the slave have this responsibility to protect the other one.
So in general I would say: Talk with the one you want to meet. Be open and honest. Share informations about that person with a friend or family member and insist to call this person regulary during the meeting. Don’t agree to any unsafe actions. Use your brain and stay safe! If you follow these things your first experience with SM can be amazing!
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